That's Sew Burlesque

I have decided to blog it.  I want to take up cross stitch again but this time in a big way.  I have got some very VERY ambitious patterns made from photographs of burlesque performers.  They are big and they are elaborate and I really want to do at least one of them.  I set up my Kick Starter with a £100 goal for a standing tapestry frame, a large piece of cross stitch fabric and a great many coloured threads.  I am pretty close to my goal but time is winding down.

Please do take a look at the project and support if you can.  Thank you x

kick Starter Page

A grumble

I am having a grumble day today.  I have a lot of allergies and they are all to do with my skin, eyes and sinuses.  I am allergic to my own cat, dust, pollen and all sorts of make up.  I get conjunctivitis at the drop of a hat and my eyes water a lot most days just because they can.

I have not had a reaction on my lips for a long time though (the ones on my face, keep it clean people) but I have had a really bad one and it's driving me barmy.  Had it a full week now and it's just getting worse so I am doctor bound this afternoon.

This is something that actually bothers me a lot when I consider performing regularly.  I can't just put make up on and take it off one night and then do it again the following night.  My eyes water all over so make up won't stay.  I get horrid gooey eyes for the next week if I over do it.

This is my grumble and now I have done with grumbling so I am going to sit here and feel sorry for myself until doctor time.  Then I am going to get a big tub of ice cream and feel sorry for myself with that.

It almost doesn't look too bad but trust me, it bloody is

Feathers and potatoes

What has been rattling about in my brain space today?  Let's see.  Mostly burlesque (obvs).  I am currently working on four shows at once all up in the future and have been using some great advice from some wonderful awesome sauce woman who gave me the bestest pep talk ever.  So it has been all burly burly burly and it's all coming together quite well so far.  Still a lot to do but it's looking good and I hope to build up to something really crazy awesome next year.  Watch this space ;) 

I have also just made one large purple feather fan, next one to follow tonight I think, and I have been making the pasties.  I opened an Etsy shop last night too to flog some of my pastie creations.  All simple ones so far but going to try and get a bit more fancy with it soon.

I have had allotment stuff in my brain space too.  Got more done in the last couple of days and I keep having a bit of a sad thought.  I want to make it really nice down there, it will take a while but I want it to be a place that is lovely to sit in with tea and cake in the summer.  Only thing is that the area is a little questionable and just yesterday we were there (me and the hubster) and someone went past and asked if we had seen anyone go past with some wooden beams that had been stolen from an allotment further down.  Wooden beams?  Really?  Just leave other people's shit alone you twats.  I have also been told stories of people turning up to the allotment to find their veggies have been dug up and stolen.  My mother in law has had her allotment ransacked a couple of times too.  How can I make my allotment a nice and pretty place if people are going to steal and destroy things?  I want to make little bird feeders and up-cycle some chairs and a little table but will they just be gone in a few days?  I want to get small fry involved and interested in the garden and making nice things, but I worry it will be ruined and it will break his little heart.  This has left me pondering if it's even worth all the effort and if I should leave it looking a bit scruffy and messy.

In the end I have decided I want it to look nice and it is worth the effort and getting small fry in to it.  I don't want to let the twats win and dictate to me what I can or can't do and I sure as hell don't want to teach my small that.  Even if they get in and wreck it all, we will just build it back up again.  It's like terrorism.  I'm not going to stop my travels to big cities on the worry there might be someone attacking.  So I am not going to change the way I live and keep my allotment on the worry of twats breaking it.  Bring on the left over part tins of paint and the old garden chairs dug out of a skip, get me the rusty little table ditched down the back of the houses, the salvaged wood and the old tea cups.  Let's make that spot of land pretty :) .............and glittery of course x

Shows, twats and lovely people

I went to help out Penny Sweets at a wonderful Leeds show last night doing the maid/stage kitten thing.  I do love doing that job, I get to be buzzing about all over the place and feel very involved in everything and every act.  It was amazing and I got to meet some fab people.  I have not heard back yet about the total amount raised, but the show was raising money for a lovely bar called Sid's Little Egg which was badly damaged during the floods after only being open for two months.  I'm sure the total raised will be pretty staggering, it was sold out and the auction items were unreal and went for some insane sums of money.

While backstage I was poking about at the costumes of the lovely Pinky DeVille and Havana Hurricane, they are soooooooo good so I had to have a bit of a peek for some ideas on construction (I am rather rubbish with costume).

There had to be some gobby gob shites there though, happens at a few shows.  You get the ones that won't shut up and then you get the ones who are just down right twats.  Getting up on the stage area while the show was in progress, shouting out a load of crap to performers, you know the type.  Silly drunk girls who, I am assuming have no attention paid to them in their lives mixed with being "well jel" of the amazing acts on stage getting so much (very deserved and earned) attention.  Put lots of alcohol in that for a hat trick of full blown arsehole.  I will never understand the mentality of someone who wants to destroy other peoples things for no reason.  Be that personal or public property, stealing something that someone has worked hard to buy or trying to ruin an event/act that someone has put their soul in to creating.  Needless to say everyone in the room hated them and was glad when they finally did one out the door, so they only truly served in making themselves look like tossers.  Good job girls.

For every dickwad out there though, there are100 great people, so never let the bastards get you down.  There was hell of a lot of love and support in that room and even some great dancing to the wonderful songs sung by the very sparkly Em Brulee and the down right gorgeous Sadia.  Wilson was amazing and I can't wait for the album launch night, Adrien Salamon had some wicked tricks, loved seeing how they worked though I didn't see how he did all of them so a couple still have me stumped.


If I was going to pick out my highlight of the night though, it would have to be when the comedian was on, Monty Burns.  Great Simpsonesque name.  But I can now not quite remember what the joke was because all I remember was Em Brulee nearly spitting her drink all over the place as she was laughing the biggest, dirtiest belly laugh of all time.  Although The Viaduct Show Girls come close, they were just unreal.  Those heels were massive and how they could dance in them is beyond me.  They were seriously tucked too, there was nothing there at all.  NOTHING!

An all round brilliant night and it's going to happen all over again tonight for my show in Featherstone.  Wish us luck guys xxx

About today

The first time I said fuck sake today was when my alarm went off.  I was very tired because small fry kept me up all night.  I had a hard time getting myself moving but managed it eventually.  I then said fuck sake when I saw the state of the living room, another hat tip to small fry there.  I went out to find my car frozen over so a third fuck sake popped up.  My first and second clients (I work for Age UK home support) were fine but then came the third.  Always with a mammoth shopping list and very picky about it all.  I got to the town to find the list had vanished from my pocket so fuck sake came to visit again.  I looked all over and traced my steps but it was gone.  Went back to the car and it was not there either, bringing out yet another fuck sake.  Ended up going back to re do the list with the client.  This all set me back by a long way for getting to the fourth client appointment so fuck sake it was.  Got there and made sure all was fine before finally making my exit back towards home.  I should also mention that all the driving between these locations held many more fuck sakes as the road was full of asshats.

Then it happened.  Went to call in on one of my other clients, a lovely gentleman who wanted to read books about WW2 and have a nice birthday card for his brother.  I knocked on his door with a lovely brother card which had a picture of gardening things on the front as I was told what a keen gardener he had always been.  I also produced not one, not two, not three but four books all about WW2 that I found in a charity shop.  He gave me a corker of a smile and seemed to be very happy.  He said they were all perfect and it had made his day.

You might have a full day of fuck sake, but when you do something nice for someone and see them so happy it gets rid of all the fuck sakes.  Go be nice :)

P.S got a nice hug from my Big Issue selling friend too

Writing Stuff

I have decided to start a blog because I sometimes want to just spout things and don't always feel like Facebook is the place for it.  I need somewhere that is still public but a bit further away from my everyday shizz.  I am probably going to be putting all sorts of random crap here but the main theme will most likely be burlesque and the allotment.